My Name is Wilkis Zarin
by m4x70r
Summary: An Imperial Soldier witnesses a massacre and comes to grips with his life in the Empire. He reevaluates his loyalty and considers his own sins. Takes place during the Original Trilogy. One Shot.


My name is Wilkis Zarin. I am 24 years old. I am a Storm Trooper in the Desert Sands Unit serving in the Imperial Army.

I have served the Empire for the past 4 years aboard the Star Destroyer Devastator. The Devastator has been Darth Vaders personal Flag Ship for some time now and while we more or less obey the orders of our ship's Captain, Mulchive Wermis, we often work directly for Darth Vader. His word is law and we follow it without hesitation.

It is this blind loyalty that has led me to the personal conflict I now face. For years I have believed in our mission and our service. Our goals were noble, our cause was just. We knew who the enemy was and we fought them with honor. But things have changed. The Empire has changed. I no longer feel the same blind loyalty as I once did. If anyone knew, if Lord Vader knew, how I truly felt. Then I would be dead already.

Everything changed the other day, when the Devastator entered the Tatoonie system. The 501st Legion had tracked a Rebel ship, the Tantive IV, to the Tatoonie system. Intelligence suggested that it had received stolen plans for an Imperial Battlestation. As it turned out, the Rebel spy aboard that vessel was none other than Princess Leia Organa, an Imperial senator from the planet Alderaan. When we first learned of her involvement, it truly drove the point home that this mission had incredibly high stakes. The 501st were the squad tasked with storming her ship. They met little resistance, a few poorly equipped and poorly trained crewmen tried to fend them off, but eventually they captured the ship and the Senator. Lord Vader tried to coax her into surrendering the stolen plans but she was stubborn and gave up nothing. Eventually it was learned that she had launched an escape pod toward the planet, and it was assumed she had stashed the plans aboard it.

Lord Vader ordered Commander Praji to land on the surface and search for the plans personally. But rather than bother with doing this task himself, he ordered my unit Commander Captain Mod Terrik to lead our unit, Desert Sands, down to the planet. I suppose it made sense. After all Desert Sands was specialized in operating in high temperature climates, and Tatoonie was a desert world. To be honest, I was excited to get some action on this particular mission. Like I said, we knew the stakes were high. This was a chance to do a great service in the name of our Empire.

Captain Terrik had our unit board a Sentinel Class Shuttle and we made our way down to the surface. When we landed, we were met by units from a local garrison that was stationed on Tatoonie. This unit made use of tamed beasts called Dewbacks from the local climate to get around. Our unit was forced to walk on foot. It was hot, dreadfully hot. Our Storm Trooper armor cooling systems were working at max capacity just to keep us from passing out. We located the jettisoned escape pod rather quickly. It stood out well against the desert terrain. As we approached the downed escape pod we spotted the tracks leading away from it. The reports of this craft being unmanned were false. Several troopers went to check the pod for the plans while I walked along the tracks and scanned for any clues about who we were tracking. The plans were not aboard the pod, but I spotted a damaged washer in the sand. It was bright gold, obviously a piece that had fallen off some sort of droid. I showed Captain Terrik. He came to the same conclusion. We were looking for droids.

So far so good. We knew what to look for, and on foot, droids couldn't get far. We mounted up and followed the tracks. Eventually the tracks split in two. One track was made by a bi-pedal droid, most likely a Protocall Droid, the other were wheeled tracks, likely from an Astromech Droid.

Captain Terrik sent the local garrison to pursue the Astromech tracks while my squad pursued the Protocall droid's tracks. Eventually we came upon a point where the foot prints intercepted the tracks of a large vehicle. The search became more complicated. Whatever this vehicle was, they had picked up the droid and made off with it. We assumed the worst of course, that this was a Rebel vehicle sent to retrieve the plans. Since we were on foot, there was no way we could catch up with this unknown vehicle. We called for our Transport. Nightfall came and Captain Terrik opted to make camp for the night. Intelligence of this planet suggested that a species known as the Sand People operated at night and were extremely dangerous. We setup a defensive camp around our Sentinel Shuttle and turned in. The night was uneventful, and we awoke in the morning to find the squad from the local garrison approaching. Their night it seemed was different and they had news to report.

They had tracked the Astromech droid tracks into some rough terrain, but the tracks came to a dead end. They spotted a vehicle leaving the area. A Jawa Sand Crawler. I thought to myself, "good, then the droids were not picked up by the Rebellion". It seemed like all we had to do was find this Sand Crawler and confiscate the droids. The local garrison Troopers were unable to pursue the Sand Crawler as night fell and so they too made camp. It turns out they fended off an attack by the Sand People in the middle of the night. Fortunately for them, being stationed on this world, they were familiar with these creatures and suffered no casualties. However they took clothing and weapons from the dead Sand People as trophies. This was my first sign that something was, off.

I had heard of solider taking mementos from battle, but I had never done so myself. In fact no one from Desert Sands had ever done such a thing. It was a new experience for us. Some of the Troopers from my unit discussed with some excitement, these trophies that the local garrison had looted off their fallen foes. I took no part in it. I found no honor in it. As the Suns were rising, Captain Terrik had us mount up. We boarded the Shuttle and launched. We would track this "Sand Crawler" from the air.

The local garrison managed to get their desert beasts aboard the shuttle. The smell was something fierce. It wasn't long until the pilots spotted the Sand Crawler in the distance. We landed directly in front of them. They came to a stop and did not attempt to flee. I was confident that our mission would be over soon and we'd go home with success.

As we exited the Shuttle, we were met by a pair of Jawas who had exited their vehicle. The Sand Crawler was massive, a good 25 meters in height. The Jawas in contrast were rather small. I took up a position just outside the Shuttle while Captain Terrik and another Trooper from the local garrison walked over to interview the Jawas. I was fascinated by them, such small creatures, living in such a hostile environment. I wondered how they could fend off attacks by the Sand People. But my curiosity was quickly replaced with shock.

Without warning, Captain Terrik motioned to the Trooper beside him. That Trooper lifted his rifle and fired several shots into one of the Jawa's. I'll never forget the high pitched screams from his companion. That companion turned and began running towards the Sand Crawler. Captain Terrik aimed his rifle and fired a shot. The Jawa fell dead. I stood there in shock. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. These Jawas were no enemies of the Empire, they just happened upon two droids wandering the desert. Their only mistake was picking them up.

"The Jawas sold the Droid!" Captain Terrik yelled. "Kill them all!"

I was dumbfounded. I was ready to defy the orders, and foolishly thought that someone else would speak up in argument of that order. But no one did. My fellow Troopers disembarked from the Shuttle, and with a disgusting level of enthusiasm they started firing at the Sand Crawler. I aimed my weapon out of instinct but was already sick to my stomach at the sight of this turn of events.

Several Jawas armed with small blasters exited the vehicle. One fired off a shot in my general direction. My training took over and I fired back. I hit him right in the head, and it sent him flying. The other Troopers killed the other Jawa quickly. A Troopers began entering the Sand Crawler and I could hear them firing shot after shot. I stood there, motionless. I wanted no part of this atrocity, and yet, my training had led me to kill one of the Jawas without giving it a single moment of forethought. I was sick to my stomach. I dropped to my knees and removed my helmet. I emptied the contents of my breakfast into the sand. Constantly the sound of blaster rifles being fired echoed through the air as I lay there sick with grief. At one point Captain Terrik came up to me.

Embarrassed or afraid, I lied. I said my cooling unit was broken and that I was suffering from heat exhaustion. Some part of me did not want to admit my weakness at getting ill from this event. But it was the event that caused this.

Eventually the blaster shots stopped. Captain Terrik told me to go lay down and recover from the heat in the Shuttle. As I lay there, he had the other Troopers cover up any evidence of the Empires involvement in the massacre. He used the war trophies stolen the night before by the local garrison to make it appear as though the Sand People had committed the atrocity. After an hour or so, everyone boarded the Shuttle. We took off and followed the tracks of the Sand Crawler back from where they came. I sat in my seat silent. A few of the guys tried to poke fun at me for getting sick but my lack of response eventually bored them and they left me alone. Hidden behind my Trooper Mask, I was able to grimace in peace. Tears fell from my eyes. Never before had I cried at the loss of life that I was responsible for. Before today, when I killed someone, they were an enemy. These Jawas were enemies to no one. They did not deserve to die, and no explanation would convince me. I thought I had seen the worst of it, but I was wrong.

It wasn't long until the pilots spotted a Farming Homestead. The Jawas Sand Crawler tracks led right to it. We touched down and everyone exited the ship. We surrounded the house. An older gentleman and his wife exited. The man was cautious and worried to suddenly find himself facing off against 20 or so Storm Troopers.

Captain Terrik approached him. He asked about the droids. The man denied buying them at first, but upon being threatened by Terrik he relented. He admitted buying them, said that he didn't know they were stolen. Terrik pretended to be sympathetic. He asked where the droids were. The man said something about his nephew taking them for repairs. Then Terrik turned to the Troopers next to him and told them to detain them.

The couple resisted at first, but they could not fight back. The Troopers got them on their knees with their hands on their heads. Captain Terrik pulled out a communicator and contacted the Devastator. He talked with someone for a few minutes. I couldn't hear what was said, and I couldn't take my eyes off the couple. They were old, simple folk who wanted no part of the war. They would have given the Droids over if they were not out for repairs, this much was clear. Terrik got off the communicator. Then ordered the Troopers to execute the couple.

I yelled out a "No!' but it was drowned out under the sound of automatic blaster fire. So many shots, the couple were vaporized instantly. The farm house eventually caught fire from the blasts. When the shots finally stoppe,d all that remained of the couple were smoldering skeletons atop black metled sand that had turned to glass. I couldn't believe it. Terrik had us re-board immediately. I stood there for a moment, then turned and got on board.

The Empire was meant to stand for Order and Justice. If those people had committed a crime, then they should have been arrested and tried in a Court of Law. Instead they were gunned down like animals outside their home. This was not Justice, this was murder. Everything that I stood for was absent from the actions of my fellow troops. I felt a million miles away as I sat next to these men I now saw as monsters.

The Shuttle took us to a nearby town. Captain Terrik told us we would position ourselves throughout the settlement and setup checkpoints. We were to interrogate anyone and everyone until we had found the Droids. But I was going to have no part of that. The 20 or so minute ride to that town, were the last minutes I would spend as a Solider of the Empire. I resolved then and there to leave the Empire. I told myself I would fight to stop them. I could not stand by helpless while such atrocities were committed. I looked around the cabin, at the men I had served with. I had fought alongside these men for years. I had killed others in combat to save them. I had been saved by them. Before today I felt as close to them as I felt to my family. I would have died for them. But now as I look at them, I feel like they are strangers. I do not know them at all. The people I knew would not have done such horrors so willingly. They would have stood up against the Captain with me. I wanted to blame the Captain for all of this, for the massacre of the Jawas, for the murder of the farmers. But the truth was, every one of troopers were just as guilty.

It occurred to me, that I was guilty too. All those times I had killed in the name of the Empire. Were the lines so clearly drawn in the sand? I had convinced myself they were, but the lines were starting to blur. I was unable to justify my service any longer. My only hope at redemption was to fight the Empire. It was a strange feeling. I felt so alone.

The Shuttle landed in the Imperial Garrison at a town called Mos Eisley. The local Troopers took the Dewbacks off of the Shuttle. I slowly walked towards the garrison gate. No one really paid any attention to me. I looked back at my former colleagues, then turned the corner and ran. I ran hard. Soon I was getting stares from the townsfolk as I rushed by them. I realized I had to dump my armor.

I ducked into an alleyway. Stripped off my helmet and armor quickly. I tossed them to the ground. I stared at the helmet for a minute. I was disgusted by everything is represented. Somehow, it was easier for me to see the helmet as separate from myself, as the one who was at fault for the actions I had been part of. It felt liberating to remove it. And now I wanted to get as far away from it and everything it meant as fast as possible.

But soon I realized that without any ID or money, I would be stuck here on this back water planet. It wouldn't be long until the Desert Sands unit realized I was gone and not much longer until they realized I had deserted them. My picture would be plastered on every terminal and they would hunt me down. I would face the same kind of execution I witnessed earlier that day. I found a dirty and heavily worn cloak in the trash bin and put it on. I put all of my Storm Trooper armor and my blaster in a trash bag and slung it over my shoulder. I had to find some way off this planet. Night fall was approaching and I couldn't be on the streets or else the patrols would find me.

I made my way to a local bar dodging Storm Trooper checkpoints along the way. The place was a crime den for sure. Here, to my fortune, everyone seemed content to just leave others alone. No one knew what sorts of trouble the other patrons were in, or what sort of trouble they could bring. I stayed here all night, alone in a corner booth. I was expecting the bar tender to kick me out for not ordering anything but he probably just assume I wasn't worth the trouble. That was fine with me.

The next morning I awoke. I was still in the booth, my trash bag was still at my side. I knew I had to act quickly. I had to find a way off this world. I asked around for a bit, trying to find a pilot to charter passage off planet. I met a large Wookiee who said he might have passage for me, but I would need to speak to his friend first. He led me to a booth in the corner of the bar where his friend sat alone. The friend was an unsavory looking fellow, a scruffy looking human with a short fuse. He wanted 10,000 credits for me to get a ride on his ship. I didn't have it. All I had were the contents of my bag. While a legit Storm Trooper outfit was hard to come by, the pilot had no use for it and no interest. He quickly shooed me away. I wasn't worth his time.

Eventually I found a pilot that agreed to transport me off world in exchange for my Rifle and Storm Trooper outfit. God only knows what he planned on doing with those items but if it was to cause harm to the Empire, I was all for it. We left the cantina and started making our way to his ship. We used the alleys to avoid the Storm Trooper patrols. It seems this man had even less interest in a run in with the Imperial Soldiers than I did. We entered a busy street and suddenly I spotted a land speeder passing by. The driver was a young man, beside him was an older gentlemen whose face was hidden by a large hood. Behind them, secured to the speeder, were two droids. An Astromech and a shiny golden Protocall droid. My heart skipped a beat.

These were the droids we were looking for. These were the droids that the Empire wanted so badly that it was willing to murder innocent bystanders in order to obtain them. I stopped in my tracks and watched as the speeder drove down the street and stopped at a Storm Trooper check point. I watched as the older man talked with the Storm Troopers. I was sure the journey for these droids was coming to end right there. They would be spotted and taken, the Empire would have its plans back and the young man and the older gentleman would be executed right here on the street. But to my surprise the Storm Trooper waved them through.

I watched as they drove away and disappeared around a corner. I was pleased. I wanted them to get away. If the Empire wanted those droids badly enough to murder, then I was happy that they would fail. The pilot and I continued. We arrived at his ship. It was a small 4 person transport. It wasn't very fast and couldn't go very far, but it could get me a few systems away. I was ok with that. I would make do with where ever I ended up. As we flew higher and higher into the sky, I watched out the viewport as the sky slowly turned black. In the distance I spotted the Star Destroyer Devastator. My old home. On it were many friends, friends I no longer felt a connection to. It seemed so far away, that life I was leaving behind.

I sat back in my seat and smiled.

My name is Wilkis Zarin. I am 24 years old. And I am a free man.


End file.
